Friday, August 9, 2013

Our Not So Happy Anniversery

Thursday was just another day. I was being a mom and doing daycare and Papa had worked night shift and was sleeping. It was just a normal day... Except that for one reason or another, Papa and I were both very irritable. I wasn't feeling well with a pounding headache and PMS and cramps that felt as if the devil himself had inflicted them (I am still not convinced he didn't). And Papa, like I said had worked nightshift. I really really really wanted him to stay up and help with the girls for a bit. But somehow parenting has not evolved him into a creature who requires very little sleep. NOT AT ALL. He is a bear if he doesn't sleep. I love him. He is a good man, husband, and father, but there is a reason I am not a fan of night shift... And that reason, is him with little sleep.

Papa and I have a rule when we are cranky. "Don't take it out on the children". We follow this rule to the T. We have not however, mastered the "Don't take it out on each other" rule very well. Luckily the first rule keeps us from breaking the second whenever there are children in the room. Anyway, he ended up going to bed. So I went about my day. Morning with the girls, outside for daycare, lunch, rest times and naps.

When Squirrely woke up form her nap, I figured I would see if Papa would get up... The crankiness between us hit a high for the day... And then, like clockwork, my Aunt Suzie wrote Happy Anniversary on my FB wall... My jaw literally dropped. Of all the days to be having a bad bad day, it had to be our anniversary. And I had to have forgotten about it.

Needless to say Papa and I both felt bad. Him maybe a little more than me only because he does at least know he is a bear when he has little sleep. He is also becoming aware of another flaw he has. When I fall apart, he follows me. He honestly had no clue how to function without me being on the top of my game. It would be kind of pathetically sweet if it wasn't so annoying in the midst of it. The rest of the evening went better and by the time he left for another nightshift, I didn't want to slam the door and lock it behind him.

Friday was so much better. Mama kept the girls for us to go on a date, and we both put in some extra effort to be sweet to each other. You see, most people that know us, think we are a great couple. What they don't know is that it is not because we don't fight. We do. We are just really really good at saying sorry and getting over it. Everybody makes mistakes and messes up sometimes. Little sleep and crazy hormones can make that even worse. But the important thing is that we love each other anyway. We forgive and forget and move forward. So Happy 5th Anniversary to us, after all.

Sorry there are no pictures in this post, but you really wouldn't want to see any of Thursday anyway.



4 comments:

  1. I absolutely sympathise. Sleep makes all the difference. And crazy hormones...hell, PMS is tough. I found this website useful to help me track my symptoms and warn my husband! http://www.cycleharmony.com
    Happy 5th Anniversary to you both.
    Funny, but I look back now and the early years are sometimes harder than the later ones (we are headed for our 13th). Things keep on changing and you keep growing together, through thick and thin. x

    ReplyDelete
  2. Oh...I so feel for you. It can be so hard, even when you really love each other so much. Before I got married, an older woman told me, "There will be times when you don't think you love him. In fact, you will think you don't even like him anymore." She was saying in her wisdom and experience that those times are normal--and then you get through them and everything is good again. Women's hormones and men's grumpiness...a match made in heaven to cultivate longsuffering, forgiveness, and real love!

    ReplyDelete
  3. great and honest post... happy 5 years and the longer you are together the less the fussiness matters, it just is what it is... and after 23 years... you get even better at forgive and forget...

    ReplyDelete
  4. I really wish I didn't understand every word from experience...but that just isn't the case. It's nice to know we're not the only ones!

    ReplyDelete