{this moment}

{this moment} - A Friday ritual inspired by SouleMama. A photo capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember. If you're inspired to do the same, leave a link to your 'moment' in the comments for all to find and see.

The baby-wearin' papa!

His three girls love him!

I Don't Want To Miss A Thing

As you (should) all know by now, Bunny sleeps with us. It is often called bed sharing, co-sleeping or family bed. Many people do not understand (and some people do not agree with) it. Many people ask, "Why do you sleep with your baby?" To this, I would like to answer their question with another question. "Why do you sleep with your spouse?" The answer has nothing to do with sex. You can do that in many places other than bed. So, why do we sleep with our spouse?

When The Hubs and I got married, one of the things that I looked forward to the most was sleeping in the same bed as him every night. I longed to lay with his arms around me. To wake in the middle of the night and kiss his cheek before drifting off to dreamland again. To bask in the warmth of our love. Bliss... It is no different with Bunny. The best nights are when I wake with a part of myself entangled in each of them. Surrounded by my loved ones. Not having to wonder if they are ok or warm enough. Not having to get up to satisfy my curiosity about their safety. I can feel their heartbeats while they're dreaming. I can hear them breathe while they're sleeping. Perfectly, peacefully sleeping. Maybe a little nursing, or cuddling, but mostly sleeping.

As I type, it is midnight... I am laying, nestled between the two people I love the most in this world... They are both sleeping sweetly... There is no place I would rather be... My cup runneth over... That is why I sleep with my spouse and my baby... Thank You God!

"You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams." Dr. Seuss

Back To Basics ~ Homemade Happiness

I have recently discovered my ability to use a sewing machine! I am super excited and whipped up these pillowcase dresses a couple of weeks ago. The Hubs has been begging me to make one for Bunny in camo. However, the weather is now growing colder so I decided to try a long sleeve dress this time. After searching, I found  this tutorial. It was much easier than I expected and the directions are great. The only issue I had was that I was using much larger elastic than what called for (it was all I had), and it made the sleeves very hard to sew.  I will use the smaller elastic next time.

The dress ended up being about a size 2T...

I am pretty happy with how it turned out. The Hubs was all excited to dress her in it for church (Yes, Bunny wore a camo dress to church. Our church is just cool like that haha.). The dress plus a pair of brown tights, made for an awesome outfit. Simple and sweet, just the way I like things.

She must be tuckered out from hunting
with her bonoculars all day...

I went to Joann's today (probably not the best thing to do when my house could be cleaned) and I bought some more fallish flannel fabric. I am excited to see what they become...

If anyone knows of good patterns/tutorials, please link them in the comments!

Daydream Believer

When I was young, my sisters and I would play princesses. They would all go to the ball, dance with princes and live in castles with servants and riches beyond imagination. I however, would steal away from the ball in some act of rebellion (never against the parents, usually some evil uncle out to overthrow the king), ride all night with my best friend (who was always a blacksmith of some sort) to alert the neighboring kingdom of some imminent danger and save the day. I would then marry the blacksmith boy (I've always had a thing for hard working guys), giving up my crown in the process (marrying commoners was forbidden), and live in a cottage on the outskirts of town. Working hard to build a life together. That was my happily ever after. Turns out, dreams do come true. I did marry my best friend and we have been on many incredible adventures together.

I may be a dreamer, but I dream of simple things. I don't need a new car, or the latest phone. I don't want a huge house, or designer clothes. When I pick up something I like, I try to ask myself how it would improve my life. Many many times, I put it back down. If I can think of a way it makes my life better, I then ask myself how much I would pay for it. THEN I look at the price tag. If it is over my decided price, I walk away. This system seems to work well for me.

Just this Saturday, I saw a beautiful hand blacksmithed leaf necklace. The price was double what I wanted to pay for it, so I did not buy it. But when we left, I kept thinking of how lovely it was. I mentioned it to The Hubs and told him that I really liked it but there was no way I was going  to pay that kind of money for it. We made our other stops, picking up a few things we needed, then traveled home. We ate lunch and Bunny went down for her nap, I started cleaning up the kitchen and The Hubs went outside to start on some welding he was doing for work. A little while later he came inside handed me a small peice of metal. It was a leaf! My blacksmith boy made me a leaf! We strung it with some leather and tied it off. It is beautiful. Perfect. Even better because he made it for me. He is amazing like that.

My awesome new necklace.

One happy wifey (with straightened hair).

 My new necklace only cost about $2.00 and 15 minutes to make. The one I saw in the store was $19.99.  Dreams do come true!  You just have to work for them.

Bring The Rain

(This video is for listening purposes. You don't have to watch it.)

"Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass... It is about learning how to dance in the rain."





"Tears of joy are like the summer rain drops pierced by sunbeams."

"Let the rain kiss you.  Let the rain beat upon your head with silver liquid drops.  Let the rain sing you a lullaby."

“The best thing one can do when it's raining is to let it rain."

Psalms 147:8

He covers the sky with clouds; he supplies the earth with rain and makes grass grow on the hills.

Change

Monday was our anniversary. The Hubs and I have been married for three years (together for six and a half). Despite the struggles we have gone through, they have definitely been the best years of my life. So many things have happened. So many more things to come.

I have changed so much since we got married. I was painfully shy. A very nervous person who could barely make a phone call to set up an appointment or return an item at a store without have a minor panic attack. I was very comfortable with my issues. I had learned to work around them. Avoiding people and topics that might cause me to do any more than answer yes or no. The Hubs on the other hand, is a people person. We worked well together. He didn't mind making phone calls or dealing with people for me. He was kinda like my PR person, as well as my husband. I realized when Bunny was born that sometimes not standing up means laying down and dying. These days, I am not nearly so shy. I can talk without freaking out. People that just meet me don't even know that I once would have been happy to live out my days in simple hermitage. I blame Bunny for bringing me out of my shell and into this wide world that is full of possibilities. She makes me brave. She makes me strong. Even in my weakest moment.

The Hubs (who I have recently been calling Papa) has changed some too. First of all, he now has chest hair (and a lot more facial hair). Tehehe. Secondly, it turns out that he is an amazing papa. I mean, I always knew that he would be a good dad, But he really amazes me when he is with Bunny. It kinda makes me love him even more. Thirdly, he has really let go of a lot of things that were holding him back. Taken a lot of his worries and hurts and laid them down for our happiness.

As we grow and change, I am thankful that, like two vines growing side by side, we have become entangled in each other even more. So that it is sometimes hard to determine where his heart ends and mine begins. I am also thankful that we have a God who is never changing. Never. In these three years we have been pregnant three times. While two of our tiny babies have gone home ahead of us, Bunny is our daily (sometimes several times a day) reminder the we are not done here yet. There is still work left to do (I will write more about it at some point... Not yet, but soon). I sometimes forget that I am only 21 and Papa is only 22. Children really. How is it that we have been through so much together already? How is it that we have been strong enough to make it this far? Only through Him have we climbed our mountains. Only through Him and the people He has put in our lives have we found hope for what is to come.

Papa will be starting a new job soon. A job that requires him to be out of town a lot. We have never been apart in all this time. This makes the idea of out of town work a bit disheartening. While we are praying for a job closer to home, we know that this is a good job and a good opportunity. An opportunity that we can't (at this point) turn down. We now stand on the edge of a cliff. I hold my breath, and with Bunny on my hip, I take Papa's hand and jump. Whether we end up with something solid to stand on or learning to fly has yet to be determined. All I can do for now is take one day (one step) at a time and pray that God opens and closes doors for us along this path He has set us on.

"When you come to the edge of all the light you know, and are about to step off into the darkness of the unknown, FAITH is knowing one of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught how to fly." --Barbara J. Winter

Barefoot And Pregnant

36 & 6

6 Weeks~

7/13/11

I threw up for the first time of this pregnancy today. I drank some water after brushing my teeth this morning and it didn't agree with me. Much better than throwing up breakfast though. I have been doing good on eating well and now that I got my new Ergo Carrier (Best thing ever. Put it off way too long.), Mama and I will be going for a long walk every evening before Bunny's bedtime. I now weigh less than I did when I got pregnant with Bunny (still not great, but getting there). Meagan is having her visit with My Ruth (midwife) this evening and I am going to pop in. So excited to see Ruth and Leila (midwife assistant who I used to take Karate classes with when I was 14 haha). I love my life!

7/14/11

We saw Ruth last evening. I love her as much as always. Leila couldn't make it, but should be there next time. Today was rough. I started spotting after nursing Bunny and again when I nursed her later. That combined with starting to get that "hit by a mac truck" exhaustion, and the Hubs finding out that there might be cut backs at work and he should start looking for a new job (Ahh!). It was altogether a very stressful day. Feeling better. Not spotting now, just tired. Very tired. Still doing good on the Brewer's Diet and I feeling healthy over all. Will be seven weeks tomorrow!

Happy Father's Day ~ Part Two

(You don't have to watch, just listen.)

When I was 14 I met the boy that would later become my husband. He was a blue eyed, brown haired, crooked smiled, 15 year old. We fell fast. So fast, that I really didn't even realize that was what it was until I was already head over heels, in love. It wasn't aways easy. Sometimes it was the hardest thing we have ever done. But we pressed on towards our dreams.

It has been almost seven years since we first met. I can honestly say that I love him more today than I did then. I've watched him grow from a boy to a man in so many ways. I've seen him accept Christ, get baptized, walk away from a childhood full of hate and lies, to start a new life built around love and trust. He works hard to provide us with money, and he works hard to provide us with a leader.  He has become a man that most people never knew he could be. But I knew.

I always knew that The Hubs would be a good dad. He was always kind and good with children. When Bunny was born, he was so determined to give her the things he never had as a child. I am not talking about money, or toys, or clothes. I am talking about family. I am talking about being here. I am talking about making a home and a life together. He strives for these things everyday. He gives it all he's got, he loves with all he has, and he if he ever stumbles, he has HIS FAMILY there to catch him.

Dear Kyle,

Thank you for always being my hero and my best friend,

 for being an amazing papa to Bunny, 

and for being the leader of our family.

I love you. Happy Father's Day!

Love, Hannah

Happy Father's Day ~ Part One

(You don't have to watch, just listen.)

As a very young girl, I can remember laying on my back looking at the clouds. Wishing that I could just reach up and touch them. Alas, my three year old arms were too small. Even if I stretched them as high as I could. I remember that my dad walked by and asked what I was doing. As he stood over me, tall and strong, I had a sudden thought. While I was small, he was big. I looked up at him and said, "Daddy, can you reach the sky?" I really believed he might do it.

When I was around nine or ten years old, my dad decided to learn to play guitar. I am not sure how much he learned, but the only song I remember him playing is A Love Without End, Amen. We would sit down every evening for weeks, singing and playing together. And then one day, we just didn't. No one was upset or anything like that. My dad is just a project guy and that project was over. As the years went by, my dad could do anything he set his mind to do.

At the age of fifteen, I realized that the only thing my dad couldn't do was let me go. I was quickly falling in love with a certain neighbor boy. Dad made it his new project to torture said neighbor boy every chance he got. Thankfully, that project ended too (well mostly). Neighbor boy became The Hubs and he and my dad actually get along really well. They do many projects together. And after Bunny was born, The Hubs told me that he understood why my dad was so hard on him. I guess it is just a dad thing. I keep having this mental image of the two of them teaming up against Bunny's future fella. Poor guy, whoever he may be.

Turns out that, not only does a father's love never end, but it actually grows and extends on into the next generation. I watch Dad holding Bunny, and I see him look at her the way he looked at me while I laid in the grass that day so many years ago. Sometimes, I think he forgets that she is not me. I am just waiting for the day when she asks him if he can reach the sky. I really believe he just might do it.

Catching up: A Sunday Escape

(I seem to have gotten behind on some posts. Either that or I have gotten ahead of my self on others. Either way, I have some catching up to do.)

We began this Sunday morning like every other. We woke, dressed, and grabbed breakfast before heading to church. On the way there, looking out the car window at the beautiful sunshine, I had a sudden urge to run away. To just spontaneously take off for the day. With no plans and no rules. Just go. Spring fever at it's finest. I stifled it down in the name of responsibility.

We arrived at church and were greeted by loving faces and warm hand shakes. We do love our church family and chatted quite a bit with several people. We were just settling into our seats when we suddenly realized that we had forgotten the diaper bag. We could have gone home and gotten it, but by then we would have missed about half of church. The Hubs must have caught the fever too, 'cause I looked at him and he whispered "Let's just go".

We left church. Our hearts racing with anticipation of what this day might hold. I buckled Bunny into her car seat and we were off. At first, we thought we would just go home. Then I found a diaper in the car, so we figured we would go somewhere. We just couldn't go too far. After we drove for a few minutes, Bunny fell asleep. So we just kept on driving. We ended up at Falls Mill.

It was a glorious day. The sun was shining and the birds were chirping. Bunny didn't make a peep until we pulled into the parking space. We took a walk up the steep path to the overlook. The water below us was higher than I have ever seen it. It rushed violently over the rocks and poured into a calm pool. We winded around the rock face and down to the other side. Bunny all the while smiling and looking around with great excitement. We walked down to the waters edge. Bunny and I sat in the grass and played while The Hubs skipped rocks. We would have stayed there all morning if the bathrooms had been opened. But as it was, after a while, we made our way back to the car. I changed Bunny's diaper (the only one we had), and nursed her in the car before we left.

We drove the winding road about 15 minutes to an outlet mall. Where, with the fever at its peak, we bought a pack of gas station disposable diapers. Bunny wears cloth diapers, and I normally loath even the idea of putting her in disposables. But I didn't even care that they were cheap, plastic, "fake" diapers. We ate lunch at the Chinese buffet. Bunny ate bananas and mandarin oranges, along with organic puffs that I keep in the car. She was so pleasant the whole time. She kept looking around and smiling at us like she was so happy to be on this adventure with us. We walked the side walk at the outlet mall and window shopped. We went in the bulk foods store and bought some organic whole grain pasta and a bag of chocolate cover raisins. Then Bunny started getting sleepy, so we headed back to the car and changed her into one of the disposable diapers, nursed her, and headed home. She dozed off within minutes.

The drive home was warm and cozy. The Hubs and I chatted and Bunny slept. As we pulled into the driveway, I glanced at the clock expecting to find it late in the day. It was only 1:00pm. The rest of the afternoon was spent taking a walk, Bunny and I watching The Hubs shoot his bow, and hanging out with family. Bunny took a late nap, but got up early. So we were back on track for bedtime.

Lightning Bugs And Lullabies

Last night Bunny went to bed at 8:30... She woke up at 9:45... We had been off rhythm so I think she was just in a funk about it all. Any way, I decided to just let her play for a bit and spend some time with The Hubs before putting back to sleep. After about and hour she wanted me to rock her.

At this point she started fighting sleep and there was a lot of up and down, nursing and stopping, snuggling and pushing away. So I took her out on the porch and let her watch the storm roll in from down the hollow. I rocked as she watched the glow of the lightning bugs all around us and listened to the rumbling thunder and the rain drops start to fall. Off in the distance we could see the flashes of lightning getting closer as the lightning bugs faded. The storm grew louder, but she was not afraid. She latched on and nursed forever. I laid my head on the high back on the rocking chair and soaked up the bliss of it all. Bunny's eyes grew heavy and her breathing slowed.

Finally, we went inside. We would have stayed longer, but I didn't want Bunny to catch a chill. I gathered her tan, ever growing body into my arms and carried her to our bed where she nursed some more before falling asleep at 11:45. The Hubs joined us from his shower and we all fell asleep, tangled up in each other, letting the storm be our lullaby.

I love my life.

I Wasn't Me Before You

By: Kyle and Hannah White

Before I found You,
Life was all crazy and out of control.
Before I met You,
I was lost and all alone.
Before I knew You,
There was an emptiness down in my soul.
Before I loved You,
My heart wasn’t really whole!

You were waiting for me to come around.
For my hands to fold and my head to bow.
Back then I tried to ignore You.
Now I know that I adore You.
You teach me to live and You teach me to love.
You’ll be waiting for me in heaven above.
I don’t know a lot but I know this is true,
I wasn’t me before You!

Now that I’ve found You,
A weight has been lifted off of my chest.
Now that I’ve met You,
You’ve helped me clean up my big mess.
Now that I know You,
I can’t wait to learn the rest.
Now that I love You,
You make me want to be my best!

You were waiting for me to come around.
For my hands to fold and my head to bow.
Back then I tried to ignore You.
Now I know that I adore You.
You teach me to live and You teach me to love.
You’ll be waiting for me in heaven above.
I don’t know a lot but I know this is true,
I wasn’t me before You!

Before You,
I was drowning in an endless sea.
Before You,
I never knew a victory.
Before You,
I couldn’t even breath.
Before You,
I wasn’t even me!

You were waiting for me to come around.
For my hands to fold and my head to bow.
Back then I tried to ignore You.
Now I know that I adore You.
You teach me to live and You teach me to love.
You’ll be waiting for me in heaven above.
I don’t know a lot but I know this is true,
I wasn’t me before You!
Yes, I know I wasn't me before You!
Jesus, I wasn't me before You!

These Are My People: The Hubs

The Hubs (AKA: My Love, Dada, Daddy, Papa, & Kyle White)~

I met Kyle the summer that I was 14 years old. We fell in love right away. After about six months of talking and becoming best friends, we started dating. By that spring, we were totally committed, in it forever (married in our hearts). He is the only boy I have ever kissed. We've had to overcome some really hard things together, but we are stronger because of it.

Having been aware of Kyle's living situation for several years, my parents pretty much adopted him when he turned 18 and he slept in my brothers' room. He finished his senior year in high school (with grades almost double what they were before he moved in with us) and we graduated that May. We both worked hard and saved money for our future house. On our shared birthday Jan 10, 2008, we got (officially) engaged. We (legally) married that summer (8/8/08,) on the beach, with only our family present. It was perfect. While still living with my parents, we bought and remodeled our home (a 1976, 24'x52' double wide) and moved in June 2009. Shortly after, we got pregnant with Bunny.

I have loved Kyle everyday for over six and a half years. He is an amazing man of God, a great husband, and a wonderful father to Bunny. We have grown up together and he has amazed me every step of the way. He is my best friend and one true love. We both decided along time ago that we would rather go without things, than go without each other. So, while there is more money to be made by working out of town, he chose to work a job where he can be home by 5:00 every evening.

Kyle is always doing something to help me, whether it is adding an outlet to our living room (he is a certified electrician), baking cupcakes for Bunny's birthday party, or just being there when I need him. He is quite the tinkerer and can fix almost anything. He likes to keep busy, so he finds productive things to do. We are now working on a little shop called Enchanted Childhood Playthings. It will be full of wonderful little toys and things for children to do.

Kyle is amazing. I love him.

Giveaway Week: Saturday

In honor of Bunny's birthday week, I am planning to do one giveaway a day, Sunday - Saturday. This should be fun as well as bring new veiwers to both my blog and others involved.

Beech Tree Blocks!

Tree blocks encourage imagination and creativity and are an amazing addition to any child's playthings. This 25 peice set of natrural Beech Tree Blocks, made by The Hubs, includes a wide range of sizes as well as two forked peices.

To enter this giveaway, follow my blog, friend request me on facebook, and leave a comment below. Comments will close at 8:00 am 4/10/2011. The winner will be chosen by the luck of the draw and announced in this post by the end of that day. Thanks for supporting and participating!


THE WINNER IS # 6 ~ NICOLE!!!
Congratulations!!!


Thanks to everyone who took part in my "Happy Birthday Bunny" Give-away!!  Keep checking in, I plan to host another fun give-away in the future!!

A Lovely Surprise

A while back, The Hubs came home with flowers for me.



They were beautiful.

 Light pink roses are my favorite.

And the only kind of flowers he has ever gotten me.

It was so sweet.

I love him.

He even got a good deal on them!

What can I say, he knows me well!